Family dynamics are an interesting subject that cannot be easily understood. Harmony is a most appealing energy within a family structure. Unity in a family creates a smooth feel to the group. When one or more members hold a differing view or disruptive energy it can cause an uncomfortable feeling among all.

For this we suggest using the intention of acceptance as a way of smoothing out the ripples. When you can accept a person’s differences it is easier to spend time with them. This does not mean you agree with their differences, only that you accept that it is their right to believe how they choose.

Non-judgment allows one to accept all the diversity in this world. When you can accept another without judgment you are better able to love them as a member of the family. Try to see past their disruptive ways to their reason for being there in the first place. If it is due to a marriage or alliance with a member in the birth family then it can take time before a new unity can be formed, if ever.

Sometimes it is useful to accept that your mother has chosen a man who is not someone you would have chosen for her to remarry. Can you allow her to live the way she chooses, even when it means you will have to deal with the disruptive behavior of her new partner? Can you love her enough to accept her partnering choice, even loving him for loving her?

Once you accept what is, you can work on your own energy and feelings toward him. You may never become bosom buddies, but you will be better able to tolerate his negativity. If his negativity is too disruptive to you and your own family unit it may be best to spend very little time in his presence. Only you can make the choice that is right for you.

Family gatherings, especially during the holidays, can be a source of immense growth for all involved. Seek to understand what is triggered in you and why. If your visit helps you to overcome judgments, you may appreciate the gift of the situation.

Remember, it is YOU and your ability to remain in your center during trying times that is your greatest concern. If you should falter, take the necessary time to pick yourself up and bring yourself back into the love that you know you are.